Congrats you’re the new couple on the block! Things are going well and you’ve planned your first travels. How exciting! It may be a small getaway, or you’re packing your backpacks for the ultimate backpacking adventure together. A big step in a relationship is traveling and seeing how well you travel together. I know a couple that took a fateful vacation to Thailand for 2 weeks. When they came home they both walked their separate ways off the plane hardly ever speaking to each other again. Another couple I know took a 3 day long weekend trip a couple hours drive away and it was the long weekend from hell! Needless to say they broke up when they got home. Im not saying this will happen with you. These 2 couples weren’t good for each other in the first place!
I travelled for 5 years with my ex partner, although they are ex’s for a reason, one thing we did do well together was travel. I was 21 when I started to travel with my ex and I know I didn’t give it one thought about whether we travelled together ok or not. I was 21 I would have an awesome time no matter what happened! When my new partner, who turned out to be ‘the one’ (soppy I know!) and we started planning our first trip together, I kept asking him “Do you think we are going to be ok? What if we can’t travel well together?” Poor guy took it pretty well soothing me with all the right answers. I was generally worried. For me though it may have been different. I am a traveller and he is not. Good news is, we travelled really well together and everything went (mostly) smoothly!
There are always going to be times when it is challenging and no couple is ever perfect. Don’t put too much pressure on yourselves. Relax and have a good time. Ive written a few pointers that may help you have the best vacay ever!
Keep Patient & Keep Calm
If you don’t have a lot of patience, start practicing now! Patience is key when it comes to traveling together. Even when your partner is driving you nuts, try not to combust and fly off the handle, just remember it won’t help and it will make the situation worse. Keep calm and talk to each other. Don’t let something as small as impatience ruin your trip.
Listen To Each Other
Don’t get tunnel vision when your away and think that what you say is always going to be right. Sometimes it’s about getting off your high horse and listening to what the other one has to say. Don’t block each other out.
Expectations On Romance
Lower your exceptions on the romantic side. The whole trip isn’t going to be roses, hearts and cocktails watching the sunset. Those happy lovers you see advertising a couples holiday clinking glasses of champagne, may be what it’s like half the time. All romance is different. Romance can be going to get your girlfriend a burger and fries when she wakes up with the worlds worst hangover (or is that just me?) Romance will be there, just not the whole time.
You need to accept that you have no control over what the other one packs, even when you don’t agree. If they want to pack their sports team jersey when you know that it won’t be worn, or they are packing every piece of jewellery they own, sometimes the best thing to do is to let it go. And if one ever runs out of packing space, learn to share the load.
Don’t Play The Blame Game
Working as a team shouldn’t get left at home. If your put in a situtaion where something doesn’t go your way or as planned, don’t blame each. There’s no point and its no ones fault.
The Money Talk
Talk about your budget before you leave for your trip. Work out how much each of you is taking, who is paying for what and how you will divide things. This can depend on the earning of each person and how you go about your financials as a couple already, but if you can work the financials out before you get there, it will take some stress off worry about money.
Don’t Worry If You Fight
Obviously no couple wants to fight at home or on holidays. If you do fight or have a go at each other, it’s not the end. It’s most likely the same stuff you fight about at home. You don’t have your safety net or as much space as you would if you were at home, so don’t be afraid to suck it up quicker and apologise sooner.
Alone Time Isn’t a Bad Thing
You will be in each others pockets 24/7. If you need some time by yourself don’t be afraid to speak up and tell this to your partner. Its ok to go do something for an hour or so separately. A little time away makes one hell of a difference. You will come back appreciating each other more.
If your partner wants to do a tour or go somewhere and you really don’t want too, especially when that chocolate making class is totally calling your name, (who wouldn’t want to do a chocolate making class!) you have to compromise. Do what they want one day and do what you want the next day. Same goes for where to eat. You can’t eat at that same restaurant every night just because you think the pasta dish is the best pasta you have ever tried in your life! Your partner might not think the same.
Don’t Put Pressure On Sex
If you end up going at it like rabbits on your holiday, good for you! You are away from home and you have all the time in the world to do it, but don’t raise expectations to high. You might actually nap more than you have sex and thats ok! When you get home there’s always going to be opportunities to replay a little vacation sex!
Dont Ignore Red Flags
Traveling together will put you in situations you don’t face at home and this can bring out a persons true colours, or a side of them you didn’t know and don’t like. Don’t ignore this. Just because this is a vacation, it doesn’t mean it isn’t real life. It will come up again and you can regret that you ignored those red flags.
Travelling as a couple? Tell me your experience!
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